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About Melbourne

I’m sat there, axe in hand, thinkin’, “Blimey, she’s a top performer!” In me David Brent headspace, yeah? Like, she’s smashin’ her KPIs – client satisfaction, repeat business, proper team player in the night economy. I’d give her a shoutout in the newsletter, “Employee of the Month – Shazza, for outstanding service!” Haha, imagine that, mate, me lumberjack brain goin’ corporate – cringey as hell, but I’d do it!